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1) People judge themselves by their intentions. Each and everyone one of us believes we are doing the right thing. Thus, acknowledge that the other persons actions or words are correct and proper (as seen by that other person). Even when someones behavior appears completely absurd, that person most likely believes it is justified. 2) People judge others by their actions. This means you are being judged by the perceptions you create with your words and actions. For example, if you act angry, even though you feel otherwise, you will be judged as being hostile. If you sound helpless, even though you feel otherwise, you will be judged as being ineffective. Thus, choose actions and words that are consistent with the impression that you want to make. 3) You can accept anything without agreeing with it. It's simply a matter of acknowledging the reality that someone else believes an idea. In fact, there would be less conflict if we recognized a) others might be right and b) we might be wrong. Then we could engage in an honest dialogue about our differences. 4) Always begin with diplomacy. Strong leaders allow small indiscretions and adsorb minor mistakes. They react with courage, understanding, and purpose. They use courtesy and diplomacy to negotiate solutions because this always leads to a better result. After all, no one has ever had to apologize for being courteous. 5) Everyone deserves to be treated with respect. When you treat others with respect, you demonstrate how you want to be treated. 6) Everyone has valuable ideas. Everyone is an expert in some area. Everyone has valuable talents. Your job as a leader is to help others excel at expressing their ideas. Effective leaders attract people to them by making it easy for them to communicate. 7) Effective communication is your responsibility. Even if the other person's ability to communicate seems to be less than what you expect, it is still your responsibility to make things work. You must increase your effort, rather than reduce it. Steve Kaye helps leaders hold effective meetings. He is an IAF Certified
Professional Facilitator, author, and speaker. His meeting facilitation and
leadership workshops create success for everyone. Call 714-528-1300 for
details. Visit http://www.stevekaye.com for a free report.
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